Ugh!

Who is this beast?!  Surely it can't be me....

It is difficult for me to look at that picture, much less to share it online.  It's surreal, like it isn't me.  I'm fat.  No excuses, just fat.  I am clear on how this came about.  My diet is infected with body poisoning food: sugar, white flour, processed crap, etc.  It's not surprising that my shape has taken on a horizontal oozing.  And I am not sure where the edges of my face have gone, they have been replaced by squishy roundness.  I am even more painfully aware of my condition when I get to look at pictures of myself and I absolutely cannot believe it.  I must not look at myself in the mirror anymore because I would have seen this earlier.

So it has begun.  I am committed to fitting into my old jeans by June.  Today's eating is a reflection of that commitment.  And later on I'll be sweating up a storm in my Bikram yoga class and hating life (until it's over, at which point I'll beg the instructor to make it a 2 hour class instead of just a wee 90 minutes).

Lunch is a recipe that Ethan and I picked up at Whole Foods on Saturday when we went to check out the raw foods expo (the THIRD time in 24 hours that the idea of eating raw had been put in front of me....a sign?).  The girl was doing a demo where she made soup in a blender and it tasted amazing!  So we made it ourselves for lunch today:

We followed the recipe loosely and ended up putting the following into the blender: 4 tomatoes, 1 leek, 1 red pepper, half a bunch of basil, 5 cloves garlic, 1 avocado, sundried tomatoes with a bit of their oil, salt, pepper and some cayenne pepper. Then about 2 cups of water and blend away!

In the mean time I had cut up a head of cauliflower, tossed it in some olive oil with salt, pepper and curry powder and roasted them for 20 minutes in the oven (I tossed them around a bit at the halfway mark).   This is by far the BEST way to eat cauliflower that I have ever been exposed to, it is so delish!  So yummy!  I could eat way too much of that stuff (is there a "too much" when eating vegetables?).

The soup was yummy too, super flavorful and a bit spicy.  Guess who else liked it?

This monkey.  Even with the spiciness!  I was shocked!  

I'm taking this journey one day at a time.  I tend to get overwhelmed when I think about keeping something up for months- so daily attention is where I am going to keep my focus....