Monday, December 5, 2011

Day 24: Nighttime

I'm such a girl.

I had our kitchen windows open while I was baking about an hour ago (so 9pm-ish), I'm home alone with a sleeping baby, and I was really enjoying the contrasting breezes.  Hot air from the oven and cool air from the window.  Then there was a suspicious noise- outside the window and into the darkness there is something or someone and I couldn't see them or know what they were up to.  And just like that the nighttime was transformed from a sweet relief into a predatory monster.  I was practically in a panic cranking the windows closed and yanking the curtains shut....because shut curtains provide protection, don'tcha know.

On another note, the nighttime is a time of sweetness that was unmatched until 22 months ago.  Since Rosie was born she has slept in our bed.  It was (is) a controversial move and solicits it's fare share of criticisms (until I just stopped sharing it with people).  Comments along the lines of how we are spoiling our child and we will be sorry we did it.  Or, how we must not be the kind of people who need our own personal space or even the occasional remark about how our sex-life must be non-existent.  That's just a taste.  So you may be able to see why I just stopped sharing that info with people.  When babies are small (like, 1 year and under) people are compelled to ask you ALL THE TIME about the wee-one's sleeping habits, and then give their opinions/advice based on what you say- regardless  of whether or not you were seeking such opinions/advice.

Co-sleeping (as it's known in the parenting world) was something I knew I needed to do.  I didn't go through my pregnancy knowing this.  It became glaringly obvious as soon as she was bundled up in my exhausted arms that this little person had just spent months in the closest of quarters to me- and to put her in a place that was wide open (a crib/bassinet) and so separated from me was just wrong.  Not to mention, co-sleeping made nighttime breastfeeding a breeze, I mean, I hardly had to wake up (score!!).  And no, I never rolled over onto my baby.

It has been some of the most awesome times with Ro.  She wakes up in the most fantastic mood and in a vibrant tone says, "Hey Momma!".  She is right there with us, not crying and lonely in another part of the house.  It just makes the most sense to me.  At one time we had a conversation about moving her into her own room (when that was actually a possibility) and the notion had me in tears.

I can see now that she will transition into her own space in time.  We won't have to force the issue, she will just do it, and I will be a sad and proud Momma.
Nighttime snuggling with my true love on one side of me and my heart on the other is the most content and peaceful place I could hope to be.

NOTE: I don't intend to bash people who make different choices for their children's sleeping arrangements!  No need to defend your choices- I get we all are given this life to live how we choose, and I love you just the same.


  1. possibly the hottest pic of you ever taken... and i love you