My new emotional state

Sounds like fun, yeah?

Since I became a Mommy, I can and can't handle things the way I used to.  It's a fairly dramatic shift for me, and one that catches me off guard on a nearly daily basis.  For example, on a trashy celebrity news website they were talking about a young boy whose mom had succumbed to cancer (the a blurb was about a custody battle) and it was all I could do to hold back tears.  All I can think about is what if that's me?  What if I leave my kid motherless?  What if I don't get to see her grow up and she only knows me through pictures and stories?  It's enough to get me sobbing, snotty and swearing off processed foods in an effort to live forever.

And what about these movies where a kid get kidnapped or gets killed by some murderous villain?  Holy crap- I can't do it.  The movie gets turned off.  I used to watch those movies with an appropriate sadness and then was able to go on with my life.  Not any more.  Have you seen the comedy "Life As We Know It"?  I had no idea what this movie was actually about.  I thought, "Couple gets prego accidentally and they have a hilarious time figuring out how to live a life with a baby".  Which I, now, can relate to and laugh/cry about.  Well, I was only half right.  These two acquire a baby because the baby's parents DIE IN A CAR ACCIDENT.  I was in tears within the first twenty minutes of this "comedy" and had to stop watching it.  I cried and heaved for the next hour.  Yipes.

That's my life.  No more entertainment that involves broken family life (divorce included), it just doesn't work for me.

On the flip side, I can handle a poopy mess like a pro and I've wiped boogers with my bare, naked fingers when it had to be done.  That's right, I can be pretty hard core.  And heaven help you if you cross or bully my baby because this mamma bear has no qualms with sticking her finger in your chest.

All of this because of her, she's a powerful force!